Sheep support gay rights, marriage and the constitution. We have no issues with people who were born gay getting married. Bertha went to a gay wedding once, she never saw so much crying in her life. And the shrieking was heard from the back room. Never have sheep seen so much bickering, crying and biting. It was not the mother of the bride, she was the calm one. But the grooms men discovered the bride cheated.
We know, but would it be a wedding without name calling, hair pulling, screaming, and food fights? Hey, and you though you have seen it all at a Sicilian wedding. These dames put them to shame. Bertha, did you have to duck when they threw the cake? Bertha is showing off her black eye. How did you get that? She is doing a pantomime with the dog. Apparently the dog is doing both the groom and the bride and Bertha is doing the best man. That came out wrong, but apparently, the bride did not know she would be outted. Dear, some things you just cannot hide in chiffon. Like that hickey on your neck. The groom was about to say his “I Do’s” when the minister asked if anyone objected? Bertha the entire room went nuts? The groom didn’t know the bride was a hussy?
The bride evidently had a go with the entire congregation. Puppy said the bride lost her flowers when one of her conquests gave up all the dishy details. This is one of those times you wish reality tv could pick up such events on tape. It is the only way to keep the score card straight. For that matter it is the only way to determine who is straight. Mom, you had something to hide? Bertha says even the mother was no innocent. Just how big is this closet? Inquiring sheep want to know.
To those who never attended a gay wedding, you do not know what you are missing. Yes, the flowers and cakes are splendid, and they spare no horses on details. But the real prize is what unfolds at the receptions. It is no longer about two same sex people getting hitched. Old news. What the public misses are the memories getting made during the events. Could you imagine any of this at an uptight, tea Baggies wedding? Really? They have the runs if someone breaks wind. Then they insist on bringing those damn swimming pools. Who the hell wants to get wet at a wedding?
We think the Baggies need to get with the times. Gay couples are everywhere and if they knew what they were getting into at the time, and it is still working for them? Mazel Tov. Mothers of the bride and groom are just happy their kids are finally with someone. Do you know how many of these parents had to discover Junior with the bleach bottle? This puts that entire issue to rest. If gay couples understand like the rest of us, what does not work ends up in divorce court? If they are cool with that and no judges are harmed with the outcome, sheep are down with that.
We know, the bible does not recognize gay period. Um, that book does not like anything that is not Lilly white, constipated and has issues. The dog says if they dislike gays, they hate people with omelet issues too. No dear, they hate anyone who is anywhere near normal. Even Head Honcho has gotten with the times and recognizes that if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. That is the trouble with tea Baggies, they have a need to fix things and people. Gay is not something to be hidden or fixed. Nobody can control how they are born or with what genetics. Baggers don’t get this.
Oy, give us the chiffon, the fancy weddings, the shrieking, name calling, biting and hissy fits. Come to think of it that is more and more like a normal wedding all the time. If the mothers of the bride are cool with it, and they get shopping buddies to boot, what is the harm? Sheep see that as a bonus.