Hello, Sheep here, no, not the goody two shoes you see on a farm. I came from a farm, but after months of therapy with a perverse farmer, and his band of crazies, it was time for me to make my move, change my form, and finally get a chance to speak my mind about you humans.
I am sure you will find my book much like this blog, honest, totally brutal, and nothing is off-limits. Sorry, but you humans had it coming. We sheep stood back and watched you all behaving badly, dressing and abusing Chanel, and trying to pass off flotation devices as tits. We know all about that. We had to totally go through what you humans refer to as a sex change. Ours went a bit beyond that actually, we are sheep after all. Imagine if you will a cross between Mathew Perry and Joan Rivers with a bit of pro secco thrown in for good measure. No, I am not the Carrie thing that humans drooled over. Oh she is so passe. I am an in your face, speak my mind, not impressed kind of gal.
If you thought you knew sheep or how we think, guess again. You cannot go by that cutsie pooh thing that sells mattresses, or that beast used in photos in Animal Planet. Have you seen “Some Like it Hot’? Do you remember what Jack Lemmon looked like all dolled up? Hello. Actually we could put him to shame. I say we as Bertha and Henrietta have joined me in this blog. Bertha is filing her paws and is unimpressed. Henrietta will give you her opinions as well, and trust me, she is hard core.
Like I said, nothing and nobody is off limits here. Not politicos, celebs, people, dogs, cats, things that go ding, or any other issue connected to humans. The dog will chime in adding his imput, as only a dog can. You will learn a vocabulary you have never seen or heard. You will never look at omelets the same way again. I told you this isn’t your mamma’s blog. We sheep are pissed off, and ready to tell it like it is. Hold on to your panties as this one will be a wild ride.